Parenting ODD Children: Teaching Social Skills

Child Behavior, Main Content, Parenting, Single Parenting, Teenagers, teens Add comments

Defiant Child Disrespectful Child

Today we are going to discuss how to help your child develop better social skills. 


Many children with ADHD or Oppositional Defiant Disorder or other behavioral problems or learning disorders have trouble with social skills; meaning they have trouble with making friends and they have trouble keeping friends.

These children behave inappropriately in social situations and here is the reason for this.  Children with learning problems or behavioral problems have trouble globalizing what they learn.

Generally speaking, the way a child learns how to behave properly by observing those around him; what other people do in certain situations and then applying what he learns to new situations.

This is called globalizing

Children with ADHD or ODD or learning disorders have trouble taking what happens in one situation and applying it to a new situation.  They have trouble globalizing what they learned.  Therefore, what you as a parent have to do is to teach them how to do that.  You prepare your child ahead of time for new social situations.

Lets say, for instance, your child has trouble relating to friends.  What you would do is have him invite a friend over and you prepare him before hand how he should behave with a friend. 

You teach him he should offer the friend something to eat or to drink.  He should be prepared what toys he wants to share. You coach him how to behave with a friend properly.  You do not just say place nicely because he does not know what that means.  In very detailed ways, you prepare him before hand.

You want to teach your child manners.

Lets say you want to go out to a restaurant.  Teach him to order for himself, to say please to the waiter and thank you to the waiter.  You coach him before hand on how to handle the situation.  Tell him you say this, you say that, you say please, you say thank you and you smile and make eye contact with the person.


What you need to do is to teach your child in every situation you can how to handle that social situation.  In that way, he will learn how to develop better social skills.

Again, there is nothing wrong with such a child.  He is not bad person. He just has trouble learning how to take what he knows from one situation and apply it to a new situation.  That is where you as a parent come in.  You teach them how to behave in new situations.

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One Response to “Parenting ODD Children: Teaching Social Skills”

  1. Kerri Says:

    I think those are helpful suggestions, however, what if the child has extreme oppositional behaviors or heightened anxiety that causes them not to comply or be able to apply these interventions?

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